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What Happens when we Lack Self-Control?

Have you ever seen a driver of a car lose control? In a split second, they went from hands steady on the wheel, foot on gas ready to break, eyes focused on the road oblivious to the distractions around him, to a frightening view of death due to an accident. That’s how fast we can lose control when we start compromising, giving in to desires, and not staying grounded in Christ.

In order to live a fulfilling life, you must find balance between everything you do. Practicing self-control helps you achieve this balance and maintain stability in your life daily. As we all know, anything done in excess is not good. There are several dangers that present themselves when we lack self-control in our lives.

Dangers of not Having Self-Control

1. Relationship Dangers. The lack of self-control is risky to our relationships. When we live to satisfy our own desires, our relationships suffer. The reason this happens is because we are being selfish – plain and simple. We focus on ourselves and what we want when we fail to rein in our lack of self-control.

In turn, this can cause us to neglect the needs of our friends and families in the process. Just like anything else that’s been ignored, eventually those we’re neglecting will walk away. Because you have put your own wants so far ahead of the relationship needs, you have put them in a place where they no longer feel needed, important to you, or loved. This selfishness can and will eventually destroy the relationship.

2. Health Dangers. There are a ton of instances where not exhibiting self-control can affect our health, but almost all of them boil down to us not seeing the reward as being valuable enough or happening quick enough to resist the temptation.

Let’s take exercise as an example. Almost everyone knows they should exercise because of the wonderful health benefits we receive when we do. However, many of us opt to not keep fit and give excuse after excuse for not doing so. The reward of doing such is phenomenal – increased health, better body tone, etc. But the cost or time required to see results is too great for many of us. We would rather be comfortable than prepare our bodies for a long prosperous life. The lack of self control when our health is concerned can cause our bodies to become run down and out of shape.

3. Spiritual Dangers. Another danger, perhaps the most dangerous one of all, caused by a lack of self-control rests in the deceiving lies the enemy tells us and we believe. Satan works extremely hard to keep us focused on ourselves and our own desires instead of being focused on how we could be a blessing to those around us. These lies pull us further and further away from God and our purpose in life.

When we give in to these fleshly wants, we are allowing Satan to win. We are basically admitting that we have allowed him to take control of us. When we don’t have self control, Satan uses that against us.

The lack of self-control can be dangerous not only to our bodies, but our minds, our self-esteem, and relationships … just to name a few. Because a solid grasp on self-control is necessary to fight the demise of all of these things and in turn who we are as children of God, it’s extremely important that we decide what is truly important in our lives and pursue those things, acting with self-discipline every step of the way.

 

 

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Four Steps to Gaining Self-Control

“Everyone must choose one of two pains: The pain of discipline or the pain of regret.” ~Jim Rohn.

Gaining and practicing self-control is a dilemma for many people. It’s easy to practice self control when nothing is going on in life that requires self control. It’s a different matter when that’s not the case.

The dilemma is how to actually exercise self-control. It’s hard to maintain something when it may seem like so much is coming at you. Exercising self-control when your friend betrays you or your child is being defiant is a difficult task, to say the least.

What do you do when circumstances and life events are causing you to lose the very thing that you can’t seem to maintain, but try desperately to do daily? How do you find that moment to snatch self-control up and use it as the Word says you should?

There are some key concepts of self-control that will help you to regain your willpower, discipline, and self-control… once and for all.

1. Understand what it really is. Understanding what self-control is will help you to find those areas in which you actually lack it. The definition of self-control is the control of one’s own emotions, desires, and actions. Often, we will make excuses for our behavior by comparing ourselves to someone else. This is a trick the enemy uses to keep us believing that a little sin is okay and that our lack of self-control is no big deal. But we know better than that! We know that it is a big deal. Otherwise you wouldn’t want to get control of it in the first place, right?

2. Acknowledge where you lack restraint. Think about what areas oinyour life are out of balance because of your lack of self-control. Make a list of those things you struggle with controlling. Be honest with yourself as you write the list and pray about what other areas need some improvement.

3. Pray about those areas that you need more self-control. After you understand how important self-control is in your life and acknowledge the areas that you need to work on, the next step is to ask God to help you. He is there waiting for you to ask for His assistance. He wants to aid you in living a more fulfilling life and that includes self-discipline, too. It will be because of His power, not yours, that you will be able to overcome those areas of life where you need more self-control.

4. Be accountable. One of the best ways to overcome any obstacle or keep focused on a task of any kind is to ask someone else to keep you on track. Share with another sister or brother in Christ about your attempt to do better in whatever area you will focus on first. Allow that person to hold you accountable to the behavior that God desires. When you slip or fall, don’t be discouraged, just admit your problem, talk it through, and move on to towards a better and more obedient you.

Believe it or not, you already have self-control within you. It’s just waiting on you to reel it in. If you take the time to examine the areas you need help with, seek God’s assistance and ask for help from others, you will find it easier to work through each of these four keys to regaining self-control. By applying them daily, you will be able to exercise the self-control that is already a part of you as a child of God.

 

 

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